Are You There God?

Just Keep Swimming, just keep swimming.  Unfortunately, my name’s not Dory.

Are you there, God?  It’s me.  Sinclair.  I didn’t sleep well again last night.  Even with the medical assistance.  I’m just worrying, and it’s completely out of my hands.  I feel like I’m on the slow boat to failure, and sometimes I wish you’d just hurry mine along.  Head down, head down, that’s what we keep saying.  Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.  Unfortunately, my name’s not Dory.

I’m apathetic to my list of mundane chores.  I’m currently buried again in laundry, comprehensive requirements of sorting, washing, folding, putting away, and changing sheets.  For some obvious reason, Master Andrew’s room smells of decaying urine, so I went ahead a bought some Arm & Hammer Baking Soda Tropical Breeze powder and not only sprinkled it in his room, but also the downstairs family room carpet, the hallway carpet, and a portion of my own carpet for good luck.  I’m letting it sit there for the 30 suggested minutes, and actually am going to have to have it sit there for 90 minutes, since Miss M’s pickup is in ten minutes and I promised her I’d take her to McDonald’s and Ice Cream for lunch.  She is such a good child, I can’t go back on my word to her two inches.  So, I have a nice bit of laundry to fold after I vacuum 2000 square feet of carpeting and flooring once I return before the boys get home from school.    When I say a bit, it’s more like five heaping baskets full of wrinkled clothing, plus four loads to be thrown on top during my folding party.  At least I’ll plan to do that watching Ellen!

Master John has requested Gumbo tonight for supper, so I’ll be spending my afternoon making a roux, dicing vegetables, and sauteing onions so that it’s finished in time to rush out the door for Cub Scouts and the Space Derby tonight.  We’re not going to win, and we’ll be blamed for doing it wrong by the boys.  Gosh, I have  so much to look forward today.

John is at one of his executive meetings this morning, so I took a shower and got dressed before taking Miss M to school and then hit the bank and the grocery.  I even washed my hair.  My grocery list was so short, and I didn’t buy any alcohol, but I still didn’t get out of there for under $250.  I dread the grocery store, especially when I’m trying to be skinny and fit not embarrassingly into a swimsuit in 31 days…and yes, I’m counting.  I bought cleaning products since the skinny pills make me want to have everything shine and sparkle.  At least that is better than tearing into a bag of Goldfish.  They were on special.  $1 a bag.

Breathing deep but can’t catch my breath and my worry continues.